3. Wedding First Night Circus

Last week, Jia met with her best friend Ram who recently got married. Just like there's a 'holy time' picked out to tie the wedding knot,  it seems they are also given an auspicious time to make love for the first time as man and wife. Everyone in India is considered to be a virgin before marriage and She wondered how far that is actually true. She suggested to Ram that he have it arranged in a honeymoon suite in a hotel but he said his wife Sita preferred it her's or Ram's parents' house, as is the tradition. So it got arranged in Rams parents' house (where he lives, as most of us live with our parents in India) and his parents picked their own room for it. Jia wondered why parents usually did that?  wasn't it completely embarrassing? She wondered what the mother would think when she saw the bed sheets the next morning, Or when she went back to sleep in her bedroom the next night. Would the thought that 'my son and his bride had sex for the first time on this very bed' give her better sleep in the night? Geez. Jia went over to Mohini's house the next day to ask her first night experience. "Oh god , dont remind me of the horror. The auspicious time was given to be 10 days after the wedding just cos the earlier muhurat was clashing with my cousin's wedding and my family insisted on being around for the wedding night. Don't ask me why. I hAd to sleep with my mother in law till then , can you imagine? And this fAct of the date being 10 days later,  my mother whispered to me in my ear during the wedding ceremony just after my husband finished tying the knot around my neck. All of the days prior to the wedding , my parents and other relatives involved in the wedding arrangements were discussing the issue in private when I wasn't around or if I was , they would ask me to leave the room because they had something important to discuss. Why the discreetness? Because they were too embarrassed to tell me when I should lose my virginity? Or because I'm a child and matters like this cannot be discussed Infront of children although when I'm suddenly pushed into a room with my groom it will miraculously dawn upon me how to have sex? Well my mother in law evidently was too embarrassed to tell her son about it, so left the poor guy to assume in his own head that on the wedding night he would be allowed to sleep with me. Hah! Anyway on D day they made us play silly games like passing a pan from his mouth to mine Infront of an audience, and when the time came to close the door , my father in law kept looking at us and laughing his ass off. Just When we thought everything was behind us and finally got into bed, we started to itch all over. The stupid flowers with which they decorated the entire bed and room seemed to have caused an allergic reaction and we ended up spending the entire night having to apply antiseptics and cleaning the room."